August 10, 2017: You may start noticing dates at the beginnings of some posts. Things are happening so fast around here, who has time to write about it? So I’m about to tell you a story from a month ago, and in order to help you keep track of things, maybe sometimes I’ll remember to put a date at the beginning? So you’ll have a better idea of when this stuff actually happened, instead of just when I remembered to tell you about it, in case you care. Which you probably don’t. That’s fine too.
I’m just a little scatterbrained right now, all right? In real time, it’s September 9 and No. 2 is due on September 27 and her room looks like this:
and if I have any hope of doing all the things I want to do in there, I need to start panic-renovating, like, now. Like with way more panic than I put into finishing the bathroom. Because it took me a month to finish that, and “that” involved a lot of the same things that I want to do in No. 2’s room, and I don’t have a month. I have, like, 18 days.
I’m fine. Why do you ask? Anyway. Where was I?
Oh yeah, August 10: the fifth day (the last day) of the Bathroom Blitz. The day it actually became a functional bathroom again. How do you define functional? Well, here’s a pretty good measuring stick.
By the end of Day 5, one would have been able to poop in a functional toilet in that room then wash one’s hands in a functional sink in that room.
Of course, one would have to do all that without a door, so if privacy were something one cared about, one would not want to do that in this room.
But one could. I did. For days. Because modesty while pooping went out the window that time that Chris had to guard me from a marauding bear, armed with only a canoe paddle, while I pooped on a tree in the woods.
Ask me sometime why I never go camping anymore.
The whole point of this bathroom remodel – well almost the whole point, like maybe 70% of the point – was to fix the floor. It was spongy and warped, and the vinyl was waterstained in a large radius around the toilet, signaling a rotten floor and possibly an active leak around the toilet. Which would be a big red flag to any potential buyer that was paying attention. And honestly, screw potential buyers. It was getting bad enough that before sitting down on the toilet, I would frequently find myself wondering, “Is this it? Will this be the time that the floor finally gives out and the toilet goes crashing down into the kitchen?”
So as I mentioned in my last post, upon confirming that the leak was, in fact, active, we took on some unexpected plumbing repairs. Which slowed us down and left us, at the beginning of Day 3, just beginning the project upon which this entire renovation is based: the floor.
After shimming everything up to the same level, patching in the plumbing access hole, and adding extra screws to all the squeaky spots in the old portions of the subfloor (bonus!), we covered the entire floor in brand-new, beautifully flat 3/4″ OSB.
And then it was time to install the wallboard. Which turned into much more of a time-suck than intended, because the entire room had to be shimmed out to be flush with the drywall up top. So I spent a decent portion of the day ripping 3/8″-inch-thick strips from some scrap 2×6’s and attaching them to the wall, while also removing all the hidden staples and nails and screws that might get in the way of the new wallboard.
Ugh, prep work.
By the end of Day 3, we managed to hang one piece of wallboard before waking the kiddo up with the nail gun. Oops.
And on Day 4, I had to work, so I left Chris to do the rest by himself. I only helped put up the last two pieces. Maybe it was one piece. I don’t remember. Either way, we managed to get the walls done right before pick-up time at daycare.
I even attempted to lay the new vinyl flooring that night, but my plans were foiled when our neighborhood randomly lost power around 8pm. All the lights in the house went out just as I was reaching for the utility knife, and I thought, “Maybe using sharp objects in the pitch dark isn’t such a great idea.” So instead, I went to bed really early. And Day 5 started like this:
Which, in less than 30 minutes, I managed to turn into this:
Vinyl flooring with a glueless installation. No muss, no fuss. As much as I’d prefer tile, even I can’t argue with $0.49/square foot and a 30 minute install.
And with the flooring installed, the only thing that remained was to install the toilet and vanity. Which, given the time available, should have been easily do-able by the end of the day. Except that instead, I decided it was a good time to trim and paint. Which are two of the putziest parts of any renovation. Finish work like that has no place in a timeline where the goal is to end in “functional.”
Hear me out, though.
I imagined myself, 30-odd weeks pregnant, laying on the bathroom floor trying to install baseboard and shoe molding underneath the floating vanity. Or trying to contort myself around the toilet to paint the wall behind it. And I thought, “Nope.”
I guarantee you it was easier to fully finish that wall before installing the fixtures. Even though it left Chris a lot less time to do the actual important stuff, and he stayed up past 10:00pm to wrestle with the task of making IKEA plumbing work properly in a 110-year-old house, even though he had to get up at like, 4:00 in the morning to work the next day.
But he did get it done. Which is why he’s my hero. And doesn’t that baseboard look good? And Rowan woke up the next morning to a functional bathroom.
In which one could poop in a functional toilet in that room then wash one’s hands in a functional sink in that room.
Just not with a door.